Fallen
by Julchen M. Liddell
Summary: Crack-ish drabble. Four of the five Guardians are stuck in a hole. Never mind how it happened, they just need to get out. They fail.


"Oh shit, what is this-"

"Jack, we are protectors of children. You must set a good example. Watch what you say."

"North, we literally just fell down a lair entrance or one of Bunny's abandoned tunnels or something and now we're stuck, is now really the time to start lecturing me on my language?!"

"Whoa, hey, are you blamin' this on me now?!"

"I'm sure Jack didn't mean it like that, we're all a bit strung out right now..."

"How did this even happen? North, you're the one who dragged us all out here, what gives?"

"Yeah, and why didn't Sandy come too? He could help with the darkness, at least."

"The yetis couldn't find him. He is working, after all, he has a twenty-four hour job."

"So do I, but you didn't have any issues dragging me out of where I was in the Himalayas."

"Never mind who came or how he got us here, the fact is that we're all stuck in a small, dark pit in the middle of nowhere! The real question is, _why_? North? Don't gimme that sigh, you know this is your fault."

"I thought Pitch was causing trouble in this area. It hasn't been that long since big battle, and there were signs of his activity here, so I figured we should go check! How was I to know he had laid a trap?"

"How do we know it's a trap? We're just in a hole. In like Russia and Guatemala, a bunch of deep holes are just appearing in the ground. I guess the same thing could be happening here."

"Frost, your ability to hold on to useless bits of trivia both annoys and amazes me."

"Like many things about me, I bet."

"I'm going to ignore that and continue with the fact that the trivia didn't help us in the slightest. How the bloody hell are we supposed to get out? Tooth, could you fly out?"

"We're all a bit packed in, I can't move my wings enough. Otherwise I would."

"Jack, what about you?"

"Yeah, you control the wind or something like that."

"I don't know if you guys know this, but wind doesn't typically flow underground. We're so far down we can't even see the sky. If I could call it down it's not like it would be able to do much, anyway; we're in so tight we can barely breath."

"So basically you're useless."

"I feel like it's a bad time to mention I also lost my staff on the surface when we fell in."

"Jaaack."

"It's not my fault! Everything happened so suddenly."

"You really are useless."

"Shut up Bunny, I don't see you doing anything productive."

"Everyone calm down! Bunny, Jack does somewhat have a point. Why don't you make a tunnel or hop out of here?"

"Because, North, you are currently beneath me. I'd have to kick off you."

"...On second thought, if you kick off me, I will smash you."

"I hear kangaroos do have dangerous kicks."

"Jack, one more kangaroo joke and I'll make sure my next tunnel is _through you_."

"Oooh, I'm scared."

"Guys, stop! We can't fight, we need to figure out a way to get out of here."

"Toothie's right. If Pitch is out there-"

"I really don't think he is."

"-then we're not getting anything done about him by being stuck in a hole."

"You know what the downside of being invisible spirits is? If you go missing nobody comes to look for you. If we stayed down here nobody would notice for a really long time."

"...You're just a little ray of sunshine, aren't ya, Frostbite?"

"I try to stay positive about these things."

"Brrr, it's freezing down here."

"Sorry."

"Not totally your fault, Jack. So who would come looking for us, in the event that we are stuck for a while longer?"

"Sandy would notice, I'm sure. He'd come looking for us."

"I hope so too. But he might take too long, so we have to try getting out for ourselves."

"Maybe we could climb? It feels like there are roots and things going up the walls. Maybe we could grab onto them."

"That would be a problem for North and Bunny though, don't you think? Since they're so big."

"Are you calling us fat?"

"No, I'm calling you too heavy to scale up a wall of dirt without caving the whole thing in."

"So what do you suggest?"

"Tooth and I can climb up, since we're the lightest, then once we're at the top I can get my staff and we can either try and get you out ourselves or go get help. Bunny would probably have room to make a tunnel once we're gone, too. Though I don't see why he can't just make a sideways one in the wall."

"Have you ever tried going through a sideways tunnel? You never know where those could end up!"

"Yeah yeah, whatever. Tooth, North, you up for this?"

"If this is the only option we have, I am willing to try."

"Ah, Jack, I should tell you I'm not too good at climbing things. I'm used to flying."

"So am I, but we have to try. Do you want to go first or shall I?"

"You, if that's alright."

"It's fine. Could someone give me a boost up?"

"Don't look at me, I can't see a thing."

"I am stuck under Bunny."

"And you guys are calling me useless... Okay Tooth, just follow my lead. Listen to my directions."

"I'll do my best."

"Good enough. Where's your hand? Okay, there's a big root here that we can step on. Can you feel it? I'll go first and direct you from there."

"Why don't you go up a little ways more first? That way I know better; it's easier for me when the area's scouted out first."

"Fine."

...

...

"Jack, some dirt's falling down on us here. Are you sure this is safe?"

"Don't question me."

"I'm not, but an awful lot of things are crumbling, don't you think?"

"Trust me, I know what I'm-aaah!"

"Jack!"

"OOF!"

"North? Are you okay?!"

"Right...on the belly..."

"What about Jack? Is he alright?"

"He fell from pretty high up, it sounded like. Maybe he hurt his head."

"Jack? Can you hear us? Are you okay?"

"He is still on me. I feel no blood."

"Thanks North, that's really reassuring. Frost, mate, you there?"

"Uuuugh..."

"Oh thank goodness."

"Say something!"

"...This _sucks_."

"He's fine."

"We're going to be stuck down here forever, aren't we?"

"Probably."

"I'll have to agree with Jack, then. This sucks."

"Manny will probably send Sandy sooner or later."

"He'd better."

"If Pitch really did have something to do with this, I swear-"

"Tooth, really, the last thing we need right now is you getting violent."

"Bunny, for crying out loud, make a sideways tunnel. No matter where it ends up, at least we'll be _out_."

"Ugh. Fine."

"Good."

* * *

**A/N:**

**Don't blame me for anything, I'd been stuck in a car all day when I wrote this and I was going a bit stir-crazy.**

**Most of my stories have a lot of dialogue in them, so I guess it was only a matter of time until I wrote something that consisted of nothing BUT dialogue. It was kind of fun. If you have trouble guessing who's speaking, just go with the most amusing option/what makes most sense. That's what I do.**

**Thanks for reading!**


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